Broken
by Roselie Parry
Summary: When Steve finds himself in a fight that escalates further than his worst nightmares, his life starts to shatter around him. Will his best friend be able to put him back together? Or will Steve stay lost in the dark? Hurt!Steve. Protective!Bucky. WARNING: Course language, Violence and Rape. Steve & Bucky FLUFF! Steve/Bucky later on.
1. Back Alleys

**This story contains graphic language, sex, and violence... then later angst, cuteness and fluff. So please either read and enjoy, or continue your story quest! :D**

* * *

Steve Rogers let out a sigh and fixed his coat collar, turning it up against the light breeze that threatened to send a chill down his back.

It was almost eleven at night and he was making his way home after yet another failed attempt at a double-date, organized by his best friend and roommate James 'Bucky' Barnes.

He really didn't know why Bucky bothered anymore, most gals just didn't go for a scrawny runt like him.

Buck was tall, and strong with a smile that could make even the most stubborn dame swoon, and he was small, runty, and was constantly being downed by colds or other illness's.

Steve sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets, he had wandered off when his date, who's name he couldn't even remember, had tried to kiss him after a few drinks at the fair they were all hanging out at, and when he declined and moved away from the hand on his thigh, she had gotten annoyed and snapped at him.

' _What? You queer or somethin'?'_

He had cringed slightly when she spit the words out, eyes narrowed, before glaring and simply walking off, rejoining Buck and his date near a food stand, flashing them a huge smile like nothing had happened.

It was after that he had left, saying a quick bye to Buck and the ladies, his date glaring at him when Buckys head was turned.

Buck had simply frowned, but nodded, and that was that.

Steve glanced over his shoulder, there was a small group of guys laughing and stumbling slightly behind him, their voices carrying on the breeze.

He walked a little faster, keeping his eyes on the side walk.

The last thing he needed was to get in a fight, especially when he was outnumbered four to one, and there was no way Buck would be appearing to back him up.

Glancing back, Steve picked up the pace and turned a corner, the group behind him the catching up, another burst of laughter reaching his ears, and he felt uneasy with the thought of them knowing where he lived.

His new walking route took him a few extra blocks from home, and it was highly unlikely that the guys behind him would leave him be if they caught up.

 _'Just two more lefts and three rights...'_

"Hey! Whatcha doin' out so late?"

Steve jumped slightly, glancing over his shoulder, they were only a few feet behind him now, "can i help you?"

The man in the middle grinned, "lil' fella like you shouldn't be out so late! Ain't it past your bedtime?" That earned him a laugh from his friends.

Clenching his fists, Steve kept walking, ' _just ignore them, they're just a bunch of drunkards.'_

He jumped slightly when an arm suddenly slung itself around his shoulders, instinctively jerking away as the man grinned at him, "get off. Leave me alone."

"Y'know... m'sister had some things t'say about you..."

Steve glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, trying his best to keep distance between them, though one of the others had moved in close to his other side making it difficult, "I don't know your sister."

The man laughed, grinning lopsidedly at him, tugging him closer, then suddenly twisting, grabbing a handful of Steve's coat and throwing him into an alley, the surprise of it knocking him off balance and sending him sprawling into the dirt with a grunt.

Coughing, Steve moved slowly, getting his hands and knees under himself to get up, letting out another grunt when a foot connected with his ribs, sending him sprawling on his back, pain lancing through his ribs.

"You know my sister... Hildi... yer runty ass had the pleasure of goin' out with her tonight..."

Steve found himself being hauled to his feet, then up slightly higher, the toes of his boots just scraping the ground, breath whooshing out when his back was slammed into brick, the mans hands fisted tightly in his coat and shirt, "she's your... sister?"

Laughing, the man grinned, "she is... and she filled me in about you," he leaned closer, Steve squirming, hands gripping the larger mans wrists in an attempt to get them off.

"Sh... she did?"

Steve tensed when he was suddenly dropped, quickly composing himself, ready to throw a punch at the other man, only to have the other beat him too it.

Once again, Steve found himself sprawled in the dirt, face throbbing where the mans fist had connected, spitting blood onto the ground, vision blurred, ' _dammit.'_

He managed to throw an elbow when the man grabbed for him again, earning him a grunt.

Scrambling quickly, Steve managed to get to his feet, stumbling away from the group, his only choice to go further into the dim alley, hearing them laugh and follow behind him.

"Where yah going pansy-boy?"

The mans friends voice echoed off the brick walls, followed by the sound of footsteps breaking into a run.

Steve let out a shout when multiple pairs of hands grabbed him, hearing the sound of his coat tearing as he attempted to get away.

He froze when a hand found his throat, squeezing tightly, surprisingly white teeth flashing above him, "She told us how y'turned her down... ain't no ones ever turned her down before, less they're a fag..." The hand tightened slightly.

Steve squirmed, eyes widening, his own hands coming up to grab at the hand around his throat, breath coming out in wheezes, "I... not..."

The man spit in his face, making the smaller man flinch, "people like you are disgusting..."

He was going to pass out, he couldn't breathe...

The hand around his throat suddenly let go, as did the weight on his torso, and Steve sucked in a breath, coughing and wheezing, body feeling slightly numb, unable to squirm away when hands grabbed for him again, flipping him onto is stomach, arms getting wretched back and tied tightly together by his forearms, making him yelp.

"Wh... What're you doing?" He attempted to get away, but a sudden hand shoved him back down.

"Well we don't want'chu gettin' away now..."

Steve couldn't see him, but the grin on the mans face was obvious.

"I...I'll go to the cops," Steve coughed, trying to get his legs to move, but finding it to difficult.

That earned him a round of laughter, the leader of the group suddenly hauling him up by his hair, making Steve stifled a pained whimper, settling back on his knees and glaring up at his captors.

"You think the cops are gonna help a _queer_ like you? You serious?"

Steve flinched back at the words, the hand in his hair tightening, "I ain't no queer."

Another burst of laughter bounced off the brick around them, the hand in his hair twisting painfully, pulling his head up, his breath hitching when a blade touched his throat.

This was it, this was how he was going to die, tied up and beaten in an alley for being something he wasn't. He closed his eyes.

"Though since we got'cha here..."

Steve reopened his eyes when the knife tapped below his ear, staring up at the grinning face.

The man grinned, "since doin' this favour for my sister ruined any plans for the evenin'... pansy like you wouldn't mind helpin a guy out, right?"

 _'No no no... This can't be happening...'_

"I told you i ain't..."

He was cut off by the hand letting go, and a fist flying at his face, sending him sprawling painfully into the dirt, pained grunt escaping when his head connected with the ground, spots dancing in his eyes.

The hand returned to his hair, pulling him back up to his knees roughly, and he blinked blurry-eyed at the men in front of him.

"Don't worry... " Steve felt himself go pale, the man just grinned more, "I promise we'll be gentle."


	2. 9:47am

**Chapter Two**

He barely remembered the walk home.

Everything hurt, even breathing was difficult, making him feel even more nauseous, and he was pretty sure there was nothing left in his stomach to bring up, as he'd been sick twice already.

' _What time is it? Must be late...'_

Another wave of nausea rose in his throat, and his hand came to his mouth, he still had half a hallway to go before he reached his and Bucks door.

Steve didn't exactly remember passing out, but he had woken up in the back of the alley, his body cold, and it had taken a few moments to get it to move.

Which he'd regretted instantly, everything that had happened flashing through his mind.

He vomited, which had made made him more nauseous, and he curled up on himself, chest heaving in sobs before he could even try to stop them.

 _'Why? Why? Why?'_

The one thought had raced through his head over and over.

But he couldn't just lay there, no matter how much he wanted too, no matter how much he wanted to _die_ , he had to go home.

Moving had been excruciating, and not the physically, he really didn't want to have to look at himself.

He had managed to get his pants back on slowly, bile rising in his throat again, the blood and other fluids between his thighs making a sob escape before he could stop it.

 _It hurts._

Standing up took more than a few attempts, and the pain had made him vomit again, though it was more dry heaves than anything.

And now he stood outside his apartment door, hand reaching into his pocket for his key, a slight feeling of relief washing over him when his hand closed around it.

He let himself into the darkened apartment quietly, glancing around quickly for any signs of life, eyes freezing on the two pairs of heels by the door with Buckys boots.

 _'Of course he brought dames home...'_

Steve found himself moving towards his bedroom, closing the door behind him, sagging against it briefly before stumbling and limping to his bed.

His pillow felt cool against his face, his bed feeling overly soft.

Hopefully in the morning Buck would just go to work after sending the gals off, and he would be left alone.

What the hell would he tell Buck?

He found himself staying blurry eyed at the clock on his nightstand.

 _'What will he think of me? He'll probably...'_

Steve blinked slowly at the clock, which had magically gone from 3:15am, to 9:47am.

' _Did i fall asleep?'_

Not moving, his eye that wasn't nearly swollen shut moved to the door, listening to the giggles on the other side, coming from the kitchen.

' _Why are they still here? Buck should be gone to work by now.'_

The deeper tone of his friends voice reached his ears, and his already tight chest felt even tighter.

He didn't move, not that he felt like he could, or that he even wanted too.

Everything still hurt, in fact he felt even worse than when he had returned home the night before.

Steve found himself cringing and biting his already sore lip when a fist pounded against the door.

"Hey kid, you up yet?"

Bucky sounded in a good mood, the grin on his face obvious, even through the door.

Steve just laid there, breathes fast and shallow, wheezing slightly with every inhale, ' _don't come in, please don't come in...'_

He opened his mouth, but only a rasp came out, and a taste clung to his tongue making the bile rose in his throat.

There was a moment of quiet outside the door, soft talking that Steve couldn't make out, then the door knob rattled, Buck peering in cautiously, and Steve found himself wishing he was invisible.

The coloured drained from his friends face rather quickly, the door closing behind him quickly, and in a few long strides Buck was beside the bed, staring down at him.

"Th... The hell happened?"

Steve said nothing, his throat constricting as a sob rose in his throat, finding himself trying to push himself up.

"N... No, don't try to get up, s'okay..." Buck kneeled down beside the bed, hand hovering over Steve head, not quite touching his pulled at hair, blood clinging in spots making it stick out at odd angles, "You're a mess..."

Steve just wheezed, opening his mouth to speak, but no words came out.

"I don't... You were home, When i got home... You were in bed, right?"

Steve managed a feeble head shake.

"But your door was closed... y'only close it when y'go to bed..." The larger man was clearly distressed, looking rather pale and panicked.

' _Do i really look that bad?'_

Bucky suddenly seemed to compose himself, swallowing and taking a breath, his tone soft, "I'll be right back..."

Steve found his hand moving on it's own, despite the pain the lanced through his shoulder, grasping onto the hem of his friends shirt when he moved to stand up, breath hitching, ' _don't leave...'_

"S'okay, I'm just gonna be on the other side of the door..."

He let go slowly, arm dropping limply as Buck walked out, door closing quietly again behind him.

' _Get a hold of yourself, Rogers... This isn't like you...'_

Steve took a wheezy breath.

 _'Hold still darlin', wanna paint that face and make y'look real pretty...'_

Steves head jerked up, good eye darting frantically around the room, breath catching.

The sound of the bedroom door opening had his heart leaping into his throat, and he scrambled frantically, hardly breathing, _'no no no! They're here! 'Gotta hide!_

"Steve!"

Steve gasped, a sob escaping as he flailed desperately when strong hands grabbed for him, a warm chest pressing against his back.

"N...no more... please... 'can't..."

He finally found his voice, and the arms around him loosened.

"Steve... s'just me, you're alright... Ain't no one gonna hurt you."

Steve found himself relaxing slightly, letting out another sob, "B... Buck..."

"What happened?" Bucks voice was soft again.

He could only shake his head, hands coming up to cover his face, he hated crying in front of anyone, especially his best friend.

"We need to get you cleaned up, before you get sick... Then you need to tell me what happened."

Steve said nothing, keeping his hands over his face.

' _How the hell do i tell him what they did?'_


	3. Belted

**Chapter Three**

Steve clung to Bucky's arm.

Getting up was proving more difficult then he'd thought.

"Just take it easy..."

Bucky was using the tone he usually reserved when Steve was sick, and he found himself nodding, glad his friend was able to support most of his weight.

The dames had been sent off quickly, under the lie that he had caught a flu, and Steve was grateful they wouldn't see him like this.

Pain lancing through his hips made his legs buckle, a pained noise escaping his throat.

His friend caught him, Buck staring down at him, his face a mask of concern, "do you need to sit down?"

The thought of sitting made him tense, and he shook his head, keeping a grip on the taller mans arms, "no... 'wanna shower..."

"You can barely stand up... You sure a bath wouldn't be better?"

Steve's mouth opened and closed, and he nodded, "fine..."

They moved slowly, just getting out of the bedroom seeming to take forever, the pain in his back and legs only seeming to get worse with every shuffled step.

He let out a breath when they reached the bathroom, cringing when Bucky reached out to turn on the light.

Bucky moved into the small space, leaving Steve to cling to the dingy vanity, keeping his eyes downcast, unable to look at himself in the mirror.

His chest was feeling tight again, his breath leaving his lungs in a wheeze, ' _this has to all be a dream... '_ he stared at his hands, the scrapes and bruises on them looking worse due to his grip on the sink.

"Steve..."

He flinched when a hand touched his shoulder, cringing from the contact, "m'fine..."

"Do you need help getting in the tub?"

Steve finally looked away from his hands, staring at Bucky, who still seemed slightly out of focus, "...m'fine, can do it myself."

"Kid, you look like you're about to keel over... You can't even stand up without somethin' supporting yah..." Bucky stared back at him, "let me help."

Swallowing, Steve nodded, "Can... can you help with m'coat?"

"Yeah, 'course... we'll do an arm at a time..." Bucky moved back slightly, waiting for the smaller man to shakily hold an arm out, reaching out to gently pull the tattered fabric down his arm, "I don't want you falling down."

"Won't... im good..." Steve let out a relieved breath when his arm was finally free, the other arm coming free much easier and with less strain on his shoulders, "thank you."

Bucky was staring at him again, giving him that unfortunate look, "this was your good shirt... s'trash now... we need to get it off..."

He sucked in a wheezy breath, ' _I don't want him to see... he can't see...'_

" _'_ Can do it m'self... Don't need more help..."

The taller man stared at him, looking worried, "Steve... Please, just let me help...'

Steve gripped the counter again, "don't want help! Can do it m'self! Just... just get out!..." his chest was getting tighter again, he had to focus on breathing, "please... Buck... just..."

 _'Don't start crying now! Don't do it... He won't leave if you do...'_

"I'm gonna be sitting right outside the door, alright?" Buckys voice seemed to calm for Steve's liking, he wasn't one to just stand down when yelled at, especially by Steve.

Steve forced himself to nod, sucking in a breath, "fine... s'fine."

He swallowed, sagging slightly when the older man stepped out, door closing quietly behind him.

' _He's mad at me... But that means he'll leave me alone...'_

Taking a breath, Steve finally looked at himself in the mirror, feeling the bile rise in his throat.

He was more of a mess than he had thought, one eye almost completely swollen shut, a nasty looking cut went across his nose, his lip was puffy and his throat looked like a solid red and blue bruise, not to mention the dried blood and... Steve forced himself to swallow, _fluids,_ stuck in his hair.

' _No wonder Bucky was lookin' at me like that...'_

Steve took a slight breath before lifting his arms slowly, muscles screaming in protest, to undo the few buttons he'd manage to redo the night before, then sucked in a breath when he realized he wasn't going to be able to get the shirt down his shoulders.

' _I'm gonna need his help with this... damn it!'_

He let out a slow breath, hands returning to the sink to steady himself, "Buck..."

There was a slight shuffle outside the door, his friends voice muffled by the wood between them, "you alright?"

"I... I can't get m'shirt off... can you..." Steve found himself trailing off. ' _Why did this have to happen?'_

The door opened quietly, the taller man stepping back into the small room, "did you get the buttons?"

Steve nodded, unable to look at himself to Buck in the mirror, "thank you."

"Nothing to thank me for, kid... Glad to help." Bucky carefully unstuck the shirt from the back of his friends neck, then began to carefully work at getting the tattered fabric down Steve's scrawny arms, frowning at the bruise's and marks he uncovered, feeling his anger rise at the cuts and red welts on the smaller mans forearms, "'they tie you up?"

Steve tensed, slowly moving his arms to look at them, _'they had the belts tighter then I thought...'_

 _He couldn't breathe, it hurt so much, and the nails digging into his hips weren't helping._

 _He attempted to pull at the belts binding his arms, but his shoulders disapproved and the hand in his hair pulled, making him gasp into the hip against his face, a strangled sounding groan escaping._

" _Geez, for a fag I thought he'd be looser."_

 _Another pained gasp escaped when the man behind him gave a rough thrust into him._

 _The man who held his hair pulled his head up with a laugh, "Just keep fuckin' him... he'll loosen up, and when you're done Smith can have a go."_

 _Steve attempted to twist himself away again, only to have his bound arms grabbed by the guy behind him, the hand in his hair pulling again, allowing him a quick flash of grinning white teeth._

" _And you pretty boy, can put that mouth back to work."_

Steve shuddered, struggling against the urge to gag again, knowing it would only make his already upset stomach feel worse, he shifted his weight slightly, breathing through his nose.

"Steve..."

He slowly opened his eyes, resisting the urge to cringe away from his friends touch, taking a moment before meeting Bucky's upset gaze in the mirror.

"You need to talk to me... Tell me who did this..."

Steve's grip tightened again around the edge of the sink, sucking in a breath that threatened to turn into a sob despite his best efforts, "M'sorry... I just can't."


End file.
